The Life on an Enterainer

The Life of an Entertainer...

if u think it's a glamorous one... well... think twice... behind close doors... the loneliness can consume you whole... The seriousness was never seen and even if shown, it will be taking as another joke.... thus is the path I've chosen... perhaps being my size helps to add up to the overall image... Even if i' a dependable person... people tend to think likewise cause i joke around most of the time.

However... there are 2 types of more of entertainers... "the entertained and forgotten" and "the entertained and remember"... luck was never on my side... thus i became the first type "the entertained and forgotten"... my task is simple... infiltrate... loiter and wait to be kicked out... thus explains the frequency of people changing around me...

once drained out of the humor within...
My task over and thus shall be discarded...
did i change?? no...
who did..?? u who decides that I'm no longer in need of my services
what can i do?? nothing...
what am i left with? nothing

Some people prefer to befriend dogs and cats instead of humans...why?? because this creatures never will left or betray you...
I found my 'friends' who never will left me... Music and photography
Music for it speaks my feelings... spot on most of the times
Photographs for it tells me what i had, the sweetest/saddest memories, how beautiful/sorrowful this world is... a book which no words yet alot more...

I found my third beloved...Science... I'm not a man of God... the very existence of it puzzles me...
The way i see it... Man decided to create it to hide their fears, to create a false Utopia when they die... who should i follow that foolishness... what's the point...?

In the End... this Entertainer is always alone... i always try too hard each time i have something i want to hold on to... but i end up killing it each time... thus explains myself... the one i loved.. loves me not... the things i want seems so far and unreachable... the way people view me is never quite the truth... but who bothers to uncover the mystery behind me...?